Just Saying

So, it's Wednesday and I said I was going to write a blog every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Only thing is, I have nothing much I want to say. But since I don't want to disappoint my seven loyal readers, I must press on. That's why I've decided to pull out the old writer's trick of making a list of some obscure observations. My subject for today is: Things I'll Never Understand. Here we go.

• My husband's (or anyone's) obsession with punctuality. Five minutes either side of the appointed time is on-time in my book.
• How Arby's is still in business
• Why anyone thinks Johnny Depp is sexy
• Anyone who says they like coconut water. Have you tasted it? It tastes like something between water you soak your feet in and sauerkraut juice (I've never tasted either but I have a good imagination).
• Why The Middle isn't as popular as Modern Family
• Why everyone in America doesn't have a DVR. It's clearly the best invention of the last 100 years (with apologies to the internet and dishwashers)
• How anyone can sit through a horror/slasher movie
• Why I have to have dessert at nine o'clock at night
• How I've gained ten pounds in the last year (oh, see above)
• People who love winter
• Why I wasn't born in Italy
• How people can spend $4000 on a purse
• Why I get so excited when my People magazine is delivered
• People who can't give compliments
• Why anyone gets a sleeve tattoo
• The complete dumbing-down of America. Can we please stop exporting reality shows that make our entire nation look like a bunch of dunder-headed dolts? 

That should do it. For now. That was so much fun I might make that a regular feature. After all, it worked for David Letterman.