Maybe India is On to Something

I've been praying for my daughter's future spouse for some time now but either God is not listening or he has a depraved sense of humor. My girlfriend, Linda, a devout Christian tells me that she began praying for her children's lifelong partners pretty much from the day they were born. Maybe I didn't start early enough but from the look of the potential candidates that are showing up on our doorstep, I think it's clear that it's time for my husband and I to take over the process. Forget about chemistry, forget about attraction. All we're asking for is a halfway intelligent employed individual with rudimentary hygiene to throw his hat into the ring. So far, her choices have left much to be desired and I am completely unwilling to even contemplate spending the next thirty Christmases with any of them. That's why I'm starting to research the idea of arranged marriages. I know it sounds archaic but I'm certain I could do a better job. And I'll do it for a lot less money than e-harmony or match.com. Funny thing is, my daughter seems to be warming to the idea. Whenever I mention it, she challenges me to "Bring it". So now all I need are a few applicants for the very desirable position of my future son-in-law. Resumes are currently being accepted.